Spacewocket
It means nothing but it sounds good.

The Walking Dead – Season 7

A strong start and a few good episodes plagued by crappy, never-ending, scenes about people crying. Wake up, it’s the zombie apocalypse!

Ok, I get it, people have feelings… But Carol is over-the-top! Her whining scenes are unbearable and it ruins the rythm of the show.

I could re-title this season to: The good (Negan), the boring (Carol) and the wtf (Jadis and her gang).

If they continue to lure me with a strong start, only to let me down half way through the season, I’ll be very tempted to do like Negan:

Green Room

“A punk rock band is forced to fight for survival after witnessing a murder at a neo-Nazi skinhead bar.” (source: IMDB).

I wasn’t too much in the mood to watch Green Room, fearing another psychological drama happening entirely in one room. I was wrong!

An excellent camera work and a badass soundtrack sprinkled with a very convincing casting, that was the recipe of our great Saturday evening punk cake.

Trivia: Two Star Trek casting members play in the movie: Anton Yelchin and Patrick Stewart.
Worth also mentioning: Imogen Poots in the role of one of the sexiest, most badass skinhead I’ve ever seen!

If, like me, you enjoy a good punk song, I strongly advise this.

Blair Witch (2016)

I still remember the first Blair Witch movie. I was alone in my little apartment and I got frightened beyond expectations, I didn’t sleep well that night…

The second episode was entertaining but far from being creepy.

Then comes the third chapter. We heard a lot about it before its release, then nothing anymore. The reviews weren’t good and people moved on.

We’ve finally watched it last saturday and, while it wasn’t as original as the first, it still managed to creep us good. I didn’t sleep well that night, nor did my wife.

Southbound

An horror movie is a failure when it doesn’t entertain my Saturday evening. Normally, I would have stopped Southbound after the first 15 minutes… Unfortunately, it’s a trap! The first half of the movie lured us into thinking that it was good but, when it was already too late to stop it, it turned into – pardon my french – a nameless shit. I could go on to explain why I’m so negative toward Southbound, but I’ve already wasted too much of my time with this pathetic excuse of a movie.

The Shallows

We had a nice saturday evening with this modern days Jaws…
In the middle of February’s greyness, spending an evening with surfers on a hidden Mexican beach really felt good. What felt even better was to see them being eaten by a giant angry shark.
I haven’t spoiled anything yet, an horror movie with sharks never ends up without a few people being eaten…

While the acting is good, it’s especially the shooting that made The Shallows enjoyable. Everytime someone enters the water, the camera is at the right place to make you feel the imminent doom.

A bit like 127 Hours, the movie does good at making us wondering what we would have done to escape the shark. I would have died swimming at night to the beach, thinking that the shark was gone.

But, unlike James Franco, Blake Lively gets out of this dire situation in a very not credible way. Here comes the spoiler: Nancy, a med school student manages to stitch hereself with her unsterilized earrings and spends more than 24 hours on a rock without going septic after having been beaten by a shark. But that’s not all, she also manages to trick the giant white shark into impaling itself on a piece of metal at least 10 meters below the surface.
I know that I’m supposed to set my brain on standby when I watch this kind of movie, but that’s a bit too much, even for the brainless me. Even an evening with Jason Voorhees is less asking, probably because it doesn’t try to be as realistic as The Shallows.

Anyway, The Shallows is a good movie for an entertaining evening. Remember: don’t think too much.

The Expanse

The Expanse is an amazing TV show, probably the best science-fiction show of the moment, if not the best I’ve ever seen. It mixes all my favourite elements: a noire detective story, plot twists and space battles. The story is great and I have the feeling that, after the first season, we have only seen a fragment of what is going to unfold throughout the entire show.

The series is based on the New York Times book series collectively known as “The Expanse,” written by Daniel Abraham and Ty Franck (under the pen name James S. A. Corey). Abraham and Franck are also the show producers.

I won’t get started about the TV tastes of nowadays people, but it’s a pity that science-fiction shows are constantly under the threat of being cancelled for low audience. Happily, the second season is already being aired and, thanks to Netflix, the third season has been green lit. They even speak about at least 5 seasons. My only regret is that there aren’t more episodes per season and that there aren’t already 10 seasons out because I could spend a week on an asteroid belt right now.

The autopsy of Jane Doe

When the police investigate the site of a triple murder, they find the body of a woman, half buried in the basement of the house. The body is brought to the local morgue for post-mortem examination.

During my last year of Criminology at the University, I had to do an internship with the Forensic team. For a few months, I’ve spent my time at the morgue, assisting during autopsies. It was an experience I’ll never forget. I’ve never found it disgusting or creepy, only scientifically interesting.

I am very glad that I didn’t see this movie during my internship though… Of all the things that could possibly go wrong during an autopsy, this one I would have never imagined.

I won’t spoil the plot but I can tell you that the autopsy of Jane Doe gave us a few chills. The story is well paced and the actors are convincing. We especially enjoyed to see an horror movie that, for once, doesn’t happen in a haunted house, a creepy forest or a torture chamber.

My Side of the Portal

Diablo 1 was the first time that I’ve truly been passionate about a game. From the moment that Diablo was installed on my PC, all I could think about was going to Tristram and fight the legions of evil. At that time, I had just entered university and I completely failed my first year. Even if it delayed my professional life for a year, it was worth it because it gave me one of my best gaming remembrances.

When Diablo 2 came out, I got infected with the same virus. The sequel was even better and, for many years, I’ve been living in click heaven.

Unfortunately, even if they managed to make something enjoyable out of Diablo 3, Blizzard didn’t succeed at recreating the ambiance from the first two episodes. They made jokes about the excessive use of flashy colours, but they failed to provide the sequel I was waiting for.
I long believed that such a task was impossible, that my expectations were simply too high. The Darkening of Tristram proved me wrong. The retro graphics, the character animations and the old music really did the trick for me.

Blizzard gave us an awesome way to celebrate and, for a month, I probably had more fun in Diablo 3 than I had since the game was released.

Fear The Walking Drama

Following the second season of Fear the Walking Dead, when you arrive in Mexico, you first stumble upon death worshipers, then you meet drug bandits and, finally, you end up with religion extremists. But, hey, it’s a zombie TV show… So, who cares about realism, right?!

Believe me, that’s not where the season failed for me, it happened way before, as just as we first see Chris and Travis’s family drama. It was soooo boring that we considered several times skipping the show. But we’re Walking Dead fans, so we kept on watching…

All in all, the show is bad. Plenty of scenes are badly acted. The rythm is constantly interrupted by bad drama scenes, whether between Madison and her daughter or between Travis and his son. Chris is a hateable character, he’s a moron who deserves a bullet between the eyes right since the begining.

I’m glad that we still have the second half of the real Walking Dead to watch this year because this show really didn’t live up to its expectations. There is something else that made me happy in this season but, beware, it’s a spoiler.

Best scene of the show: Chris being executed by his new “friends” not long after he chose them over his own dad. In your face, Chris!

The Remains

A father and his three kids are moving into a new house. The price is surprinsingly low for such a beautiful mansion, what’s the catch? Well, the real state agent forgot to mention that the house belonged to a medium in the 1800 and appears to be have been haunted since…

Slamming doors, broken glass and an hormonal teenager, everything is there to make your typical haunted mansion movie. Yet, The Remains manages to reach the sweet spot between haunted cliches and heavy dramas. The movie starts with a pretty strong scene and brings us to the conclusion with a decent rythm, avoiding a common flaw in that genre: needlessly long scenes.
Even if the Remains is not the creepiest of them all, it certainly manages to create the right ambiance. It even gave me an eerie feeling before going to bed, and that isn’t an easy feat to accomplish, especially after the hundreds of haunted house movies I’ve already seen.