Wrong Turn 6: Last Resort (2014)

“An inheritance leads a young man and his friends to an abandoned resort inhabited by two sketchy caretakers and a clan of mutant cannibals.” (source: IMDB)

The final chapter is the worst of the entire franchise. It isn’t as bad as to stop the movie before the end, but it’s far from the quality of the other instalments. The Wrong Turn vibe is missing, it has been replaced by a slow plot that isn’t even rewarded by fun kills. The other chapters were about watching tourists getting slaughtered in a good slasher tradition, Last resort is about the weird reproduction of hillbilly cannibals.

The film does increase the nudity with the four different actresses taking off their clothes and there’s also some pretty weird and kinky sexual stuff going on. As for our three main killers, it’s without a doubt the most boring use of them in the series.

If you’re a fan of the show, watch it, for the sake of completion, but it isn’t representative of the franchise, at all.


The Final Girls (2015)

A young woman grieving the loss of her mother, a famous scream queen from the 1980s, finds herself pulled into the world of her mom’s most famous movie. Reunited, the women must fight off the film’s maniacal killer. – Imdb

The trailer looked like this movie was going to be a badass slasher, so what could go wrong, right?! While it was entertaining, it looked like a horror for little kids. The woods looked too fairy, the few drops of blood (is this supposed to be a slasher?) looked like bright red sugar water, and there was too much emphasis on the “I’ve lost my mother” drama.

If it wasn’t for the casting, I think that we wouldn’t have been able to make it to the end. Taissa Farming, Alexander Ludwig, Nina Dobrev,… made it work.

Unlike the 80’s slashers, this movie is free of the iconic gore and nudity. For the film to be absolutely true to the genre, there should have been at least one skinny dipping or sex scene, not to mention a decent amount of splatter. All it can offer, however, is a few bloodless death scenes and a couple of the actresses showing off their bra. Shame on you guys!

One funny trivia though: During rehearsal, Thomas Middleditch tripped over the velvet rope in the movie theater. Director Todd Strauss-Schulson decided to add that as a gag in the film in order to momentarily linger on the cardboard standee for “Camp Bloodbath 2: Cruel Summer.”

All in all, we’ve watched the movie until the end, but wouldn’t recommend this to any slasher fan. Maybe it would be good for introducing your kids to the horror genre…


Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines (2012)

A typical meeting at the Wrong Turn production board:

Producer: How can we make Wrong Turn 5 better than Wrong Turn 4?

Writer: More sex and more gore

Producer: Didn’t we already do that with the fourth?

Writer: Yes, but we can always add more sex and gore

Producer: Go for it!

If you enjoy watching kids being slaughtered after having sex and smoking weed, you won’t be disappointed. So what makes this chapter different from the previous ones? Well, this time, it happens at the police station of a little town hosting a festival. As the father of our 3 favourite hillbillies is held inside of a jail cell, his boys attempt to rescue him by slaughtering every single person that stayed in town during the concert. As usual, blood and guts (and boobs) are the main ingredients to this perfect movie, for a Saturday horror evening.


TIL While Watching Tenet

If the entropy was reversed, this generation would instantly disappear because, while we are the future’s past, we’d become the future’s future.

So, in terms of Kenneth Branagh’s career, Gilderoy Lockhart would be Andrei Sator’s past. But, if the entropy would be reversed, Lockhart would become Sator’s future. Of course, the entropy would have to be reversed by the first Lockhart, using technology sent to him from the future by Sator and I’m not even sure that Harry Potter would be made a second time in a reversed future, but it was fun making this image in Photoshop because I like flashy arrows.

More trivia about Tenet:

  • It is written, directed and produced by Christopher Nolan. I can’t imagine how much his head must have been spinning writing the story, mine is still not back from watching the movie;
  • 3 actors from the casting of Harry Potter play in Tenet: Clémence Poésy, Kenneth Branagh and Robert Pattinson;
  • The stunning soundtrack is composed by Ludwig Göransson, who’s also behind The Mandalorian’s OST;
  • It took me exactly 2 hours and 11 minutes of watching Tenet to understand the concept of reversed entropy while it took me only 21 minutes to write this post (Photoshop included). It doesn’t mean much, but I enjoy statistics.

Wrong Turn 4: Bloody Beginnings (2011)

If I had to give you one advice, in case you’d get lost in a snow storm, it would be: don’t seek refuge in an abandoned sanatorium. However, if you have no choice, just hide, don’t make noise and wait for the storm to quiet down, then leave.

Of course, if people would follow these advises, there would be no movie about young folks getting slaughtered (and eaten) by cannibals, and the world would lose a great source of entertainment.

It seems that, with each sequel, the Wrong Turn franchise gets more gore and more sex. We still have 2 more chapters to watch and I wonder where this is gonna lead us… Anyway, it was a good horror movie, perfect for a Saturday evening. I’m actually surprised to see how different each Wrong Turn turns out to be, while keeping on the same topic.

Oh, one last thing: I’d advise against watching this movie while eating a fondue, trust me.


Wrong Turn 3: Left For Dead (2009)

While rafting, four college kids are attacked by the mutant cannibal hillbilly Three Finger. Meanwhile, a group of dangerous criminals are transported from the West Virginia Grafton Penitentiary. The bus is hit by a tow truck driven by Three Finger and falls off the road. The prisoners and a guard, led by Carlo Chavez accidentally meet Alex, the lone survivor of the college kids.

I enjoy to watch college kids being slaughtered by cannibals, I wouldn’t watch all 7 episodes of Wrong Turn if I wouldn’t. But for the first time, the cannibal’s murder spree felt righteous, those prisoners were unbearable and to see them dismembered by Three Finger felt more rewarding than usual. Oops, I should have warned for the spoilers… But did anyone really thought that the prisoners would survive?

PS: I could have used an image of the girl on the left having her boob pierced by Three Finger’s arrow but I wouldn’t want to shock my readers sensibility. Also teens in bikinis smoking weed while giving the finger isn’t so bad.


Wrong Turn 2: Dead End (2007)

Five minutes into the movie and a woman already gets cut in half with an axe… Yes, that’s right, the guy (cannibal, ofc) is dragging one half of the woman (his share of the dinner, probably). Such a start already gives the tone: the second chapter is much more gore than the first. Nothing is spared: decapitations, guts, brains, stew prepared with human parts (and eaten)… It’s a real slaughterfest!

The setting is a bit different than in a classic slasher. Instead of a bunch of city folks on holidays, the victims are participating to a reality show in which they have to survive a simulated apocalypse. Too bad that the show happens on the hunting ground of an inbred redneck cannibal family (what a surprise). The host of the show is none other than Henry Rollins.

I don’t think that the movie is the best slasher that’s ever been made, but the amount of OMG gore scenes makes up for the poor quality of the story. After all, who watches a slasher for its scenario. We want guts and that’s exactly what we get.


Wrong Turn (2003)

This movie is the perfect example of why we blog about all the horror movies we watch… We had already seen it and we completely forgot about it. Now, I should definitely create an alphabetical list of the horror movies we’ve seen…

Cool folks cross West Virginia but their car broke down in the middle of a forest inhabited by inbred cannibal rednecks (or is it inbred redneck cannibals, is there even a protocol about this?). Anyway, no big surprise here, we loved the original Wrong Turn and we can’t wait to watch the next 5 chapters.

Trivia

  • It features Jeremy Sisto (6 feet under), Desmond Harrington (Dexter) and Eliza Dushku (Buffy). (source: me)
  • The movie was released the same year that Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997) ended. (source: IMDB)
  • When the four are running from the cabin after awakening the mountain men, Desmond Harrington broke his right ankle after landing on the opposite side of a log. This made it very difficult to shoot some of the scenes after his left leg is “shot” and he has to limp on his right leg. (source: IMDB)
  • Emmanuelle Chriqui dislocated her shoulder performing her fall through the trees. You can hear her shoulder pop on the production track in the theatrical sound mix. (source: IMDB)
  • It’s the only film in the series that does not contain any sex or nudity. (and there are 5 more chapters, quiet promising :-D)

Wrong Turn (2021)

I love horror movies, but it seems that, lately, the genre gets mistaken with psychological thriller, and I hate psychological thrillers. This movie is a real horror movie, where kids go to a forest and stumble upon redneck, cannibals, yetis,… In fact, I don’t care upon what they stumble, as long as it gets bloody.

Wrong Turn is just that, a slasher movie. It made Saturday evening perfect, or was it my wife’s vegetarian lasagna? Anyway, we had a great evening and it shined over the rest of our week-end, making me realise how much I had missed my Saturday evening horror movie.

I’ve never seen a Wrong Turn movie before this reboot, so I can’t compare with the originals. But this was certainly the best advertisement possible for the franchise and I have the feeling that we’re about to have 6 great Saturday evenings, watching more kids being slaughtered by cannibals in the woods.


The Craft: Legacy

A young girl has a tough time adapting to her new life after moving to her stepdad’s town until she finds out that she’s a witch… Instead of the film being a remake of The Craft (1996), it is a sequel set 20 years after the original.

We both love movies and TV shows involving teenagers with powers (witches, werewolves, vampires,…), so The Craft: Legacy was a hit for our first movie of the holidays. It was fun and entertaining with enough twists to keep us interested until the end.

Of course, it involves a few rituals for witch three occult consultants were hired by the production.

Writer/director Zoe Lister-Jones based much of the film and its characters in her own adolescent experiences. When she was in seventh grade she shaved her head and wore men’s leisure suits, so she was often misgendered. She also moved into her mother’s boyfriend’s house at a young age and had to adapt to living with young men she hadn’t grown up with. (source: IMDB)

Lately, we’ve started a rerun of X-Files on Amazon Prime and we’ve been quiet shocked to see how David Duchovny has turned.

Seriously, what happened? I know that he’s really into fitness lately, did he abuse hormones or is it the natural ageing of the awesome Fox Mulder? After all, not everybody can stay young forever, except Tom Cruise, of course.

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